Announcing Your Elopement: How to Tell Friends and Family

Congratulations on Your Engagement – And for Choosing to Elope!

We’re so excited for you both as you begin this beautiful new chapter of your lives! Eloping is such a meaningful way to approach your wedding day. By choosing to elope, you’re prioritizing what matters most to you and your partner—whether that’s intimacy, adventure, or simply avoiding the stress of a traditional wedding. This intentional choice allows you to plan a day that is as unique and special as your love story.

One thing that often comes up during the planning process is how to tell your family and friends that you’ve chosen to elope. It’s an exciting yet delicate conversation, as not everyone may understand or expect it. So, how do you share your decision in a way that feels comfortable? Here are a few thoughtful ways to tell your loved ones you’re eloping—and why you’re making this choice.

1. Tell Them Face-to-Face

For couples who have close relationships with their family and friends, telling them in person can be a beautiful and heartfelt way to share the news. This gives you a chance to connect and share your excitement in a way that feels personal and genuine.

For example, you might say something like, “We’re so excited to let you know that we’ve decided to elope! It feels like the right way for us to honor our love and commitment to each other, and we want to do it in a way that reflects who we are as a couple.”

If they have questions or concerns, this is your chance to explain your reasons. Maybe you’ve chosen to elope because you value intimacy over the stress of a big celebration. Or perhaps it’s because you want to focus on the experience rather than the pressure of a large event. Explaining why you made this choice can help your loved ones understand and respect your decision.

2. Tell Them Afterwards

If you prefer to keep the surprise element until after the fact, telling your family and friends afterward can be just as meaningful. You might want to relish the experience and enjoy your elopement day without worrying about anyone else’s reaction.

After the day is over, you can send a message or schedule a time to share your photos and videos. For example, you could say: “We’ve been married! We eloped and had the most amazing day together. Here are some photos and videos from our intimate ceremony—we can’t wait to share our experience with you!”

This gives them the chance to celebrate with you from a distance and enjoy the joy of the day through your eyes. You might also choose to follow up with a phone call or a video chat to talk through the experience and why you chose to elope in the first place.

3. Be Obvious

If you don’t want to keep it a secret, being upfront and direct can be a simple and effective approach. For some couples, this means sending out a short announcement or making a public post letting people know they’re eloping. This could look like something on social media or a casual email to friends and family. You could say, “We’re so excited to let you know that we’re eloping! We’re keeping it small and intimate, and we’ll be sharing photos and memories with you afterward. Can’t wait to celebrate with you in our own way!”

If you go this route, make sure to clarify any details or next steps for friends and family who may have questions or want to be involved in some way.

4. Share Why You’re Choosing to Elope

Eloping is an intentional choice, and sharing why you’re making this decision can help loved ones understand and appreciate your choice. Maybe you’ve always wanted to have an intimate ceremony, away from the traditional pressures of a big wedding. Or perhaps you both value the idea of being present with each other, focusing on the experience rather than details.

A heartfelt explanation might look something like, “We’ve decided to elope because we want to focus on the two of us, our vows, and the commitment we’re making to each other. We believe this day should reflect who we are and the life we’re building together, without distractions or expectations. We hope you can understand our decision and know that it’s the right choice for us.”

This way, you’re helping your family and friends see that your elopement is about more than just skipping a big wedding—it’s about making a choice that aligns with your values and vision for your day.

5. Share the Photos (& Videos!)

For many couples, sharing their elopement photos and videos with family and friends is one of the highlights of the experience. After you’ve tied the knot, sending those special moments out to loved ones is a beautiful way to include them in your celebration.

You might want to send a heartfelt message with your photos, like: “We did it! We eloped and couldn’t be happier. Here are some of our favorite moments from the day—we hope you enjoy them as much as we did.” This allows your family and friends to see the beauty of your day through your eyes, even if they weren’t physically present. It’s a way of sharing your love and your joy in a meaningful way.

6. Offer to FaceTime or Zoom Them During the Day

If your loved ones are disappointed they won’t be able to attend, offering to include them through a virtual call can be a great way to share the moment. This works especially well for couples who are eloping in far-flung destinations or at locations that are difficult for friends and family to reach.

Consider arranging a quick FaceTime or Zoom call during the ceremony or right afterward to share your vows and your joy with them. Let them know in advance, “We’re eloping and wish you could be there with us! We’ll be FaceTiming right after our ceremony to share the moment with you—hope you can join us!”

7. Throw a Party!

If you want to celebrate with your loved ones but still maintain the intimacy of an elopement, why not throw a party afterward? You could host a dinner, a reception-style celebration, or even a laid-back gathering with close friends and family. Some couples choose to throw their party immediately after the elopement, while others wait until later, but either way, it’s a great way to share your joy and thank everyone for their support.

A casual reception or dinner party allows you to celebrate your new life together without the pressure of a big wedding. You can enjoy quality time with your loved ones, have fun with speeches and dancing, and celebrate the way that feels right for you.

8. Invite the Friends and Family You Want to Bring

One of the beauties of eloping is the ability to keep things small and intimate. But if there are certain people in your life who are especially important to you, you might consider inviting them to be part of your special day. This is a great option if you want to include a select few family members or close friends, without the pressure of a large crowd.

For example, you might say something like: “We’ve decided to elope, but there are a few people we would love to have with us as we take this next step. We’ve chosen to keep the guest list small because this is such a personal moment, and we want to make sure it’s intimate and meaningful. We hope you understand our desire for a smaller celebration, and we would love for you to join us as we say ‘I do.’”

When choosing who to invite, think about the people who have been there for you both throughout your journey—those who have supported you, shared in your excitement, and who you’d like to witness this important milestone in your life. This could be immediate family, best friends, or perhaps someone who’s had a significant impact on your relationship.

Inviting only a select few allows you to create an environment that feels just right—free of the usual wedding stress, while still including the people who matter most to you. By explaining your reasoning for keeping it small, your loved ones will likely appreciate your honesty and understand that it’s about quality, not quantity.

In Conclusion: Be True to You

At the end of the day, how you share the news of your elopement is completely up to you and your partner. There’s no right or wrong way to go about it, as long as it feels authentic to your relationship. Whether you tell them face-to-face, share your photos afterward, or include them virtually, make sure your approach aligns with what feels comfortable for both of you.

And if you’re feeling uncertain or overwhelmed about how to navigate the conversation, know that we’re here for you. We fully support your decision to be intentional with your day and create something that truly reflects your love. If you ever need guidance, advice, or help in making your elopement vision a reality, don’t hesitate to reach out. We’re here to support you every step of the way!

If you need help planning your elopement, we’ve got you covered! We’ve put together a helpful guide on how to elope, making the process as easy and stress-free as possible. From choosing the perfect location to crafting your timeline, we’re here to help make your elopement day everything you’ve dreamed of.

And reach out to us via our contact page when you’re ready to chat and plan your elopement day!